Moment of pause.

As most of you know, I am a teacher in Connecticut. My school is about 20 miles from Newtown. Sitting here at work today, there is a quiet buzz in the building. Most of the kids are going on with business as usual. It is better not to think about things too much. Some of the kids are sad. Some are afraid. One little girl was so affected she asked to go speak to the councilor. We held a school wide moment of silence at 9:30am. Not a peep.

I didn't actually know any one involved with the tragedy, but I have a friend who just went home from work. Her good friend lost a daughter. I can't imagine it. She thought being in school today would be good for her, but it was too much. It doesn't matter though if you lost some one, or knew some one. If you are human, it hurts. I could not read a report over the weekend without tears.  I spent most of the weekend painting or playing with Jack to keep my mind off it. The thought of my own son going to school with his usual smile only to be shot down in a corner makes me want to scream puke and cry all at the same time.

In my classroom I cleared out my big walk-in closet of the various carts and things to make room. Our previous procedure of huddling in a corner was not good enough. I had my 28 8th graders quickly practice squeezing in. They all fit, albeit tightly. It only took a few seconds. Not one of them giggled or snickered. If you knew 8th graders, you would understand the feat.

With the door shut and the lights off you would not even know they were there.   At least now I know that given a small warning I can get them safe. If some psycho busts through my class room door, he better have a full mag because that is what it is going to take to stop this 300 pound art teacher from biting out his throat.

Any way... take a moment today to give those poor souls your thoughts. Appreciate what you have, and if you are a parent, spend a few more minutes with your kids. My heart is heavy today and it goes out to those teachers and kids who lost their lives.

And thank you to every one who emailed me with their concern over the weekend.

Back to business tomorrow. Be sure to check out my live show on the MWG vault!  Jim and I will be playing some live 40k.  8pm EST. Tomorrow's show is free for all.

See you then!



Tao said...

Teachers like you and Victoria Soto are the reason why parents like myself feel comfortable sending our children into your care. I am ashamed it takes a moment like this for me to come to that realization, but I do. I want to thank all teachers out there for keeping our children as safe as you can. To put ones life before those of children not your own is the mark of a true hero.

Tim said...

Amen, brother. You're really important to a lot of kids, including your own little guy. Keep it up.

FluffyPanda said...

I live on the other side of the world and I couldn't read a report without crying either. This one included...

It's beyond belief the evil that visits us sometimes.

Jawaballs said...

I left school early today. The more the day went on, the more emotional I got. It was amazing the compounding effect of hundreds of kids silently thinking about and grieving over the same thing at once. None of them knew the kids, but the thought of that many lives being snuffed out had such an impact. I had kids laying on the floor with no idea why, staring into space, trying to laugh. When I let my 7th graders have a turn at practicing the lockdown drill in the closet, it was therapeutic. They sorta just hung out in there for a few minutes. Maybe four solid walls and a three inch thick solid door did a lot for them. They giggled when I tried to open the door knowing they had the key and the only way it was going to open was if they wanted it to.

I came home and made a batch of chocolate fudge and some Nestle Toll House. Mmmmm

Gladeius said...

Thanks for your comments. I didn't. Know that you taught in Connecticut. I struggled teaching 7th grade history in Illinois. I was thinking about my 11 year old son as well; warmaster Chris. Bless you.

Gladeius said...

Thanks for your comments. I didn't. Know that you taught in Connecticut. I struggled teaching 7th grade history in Illinois. I was thinking about my 11 year old son as well; warmaster Chris. Bless you.

SC John said...

I was talking to Dave and thinking about you today.

Keep them safe and sane and keep up the good fight.

Santa Cruz Warhammer

Jawaballs said...

Thanks John! Hey I called you not long ago. Still using the same number?

General Oadius said...

My wife is a 3rd grade teacher and I have a 4 year old daughter who is about to start school...The impact of the Newtown killings have hit me like a Thunderhammer. Let's come together as a 40k community and do something for the families who have and will continue to endure so much heartache from the loss of their child. I for one would donate my entire Blood Angel army to a cause that Jawaballs got behind.....let me know if you come up with something.

Jawaballs said...

I'm throwing something together. Stay tuned! I will have it up soon.

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